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One woman’s journey to look good in jogging shorts without the chafing

Ok. To set the scene. I have always been a couch dweller, love the couch. In fact, I once wrote an ode to my couch in a poem, cleverly titled ‘My Couch’. And THAT couch was a ripped, vinyl, grey number handed down to me by my sister. On hot days I would literally stick to this couch – as if it wasn’t hard enough to get out of already. Anywho, I’ll dig out the poem and post it here in a little bit.

I have done a little bit of running before. A couple of 5km and 10km fun runs here and there but I haven’t really been running for a year now. And as testament to that fact I have gained several kilos, the ‘fat’ jeans that I bought now have muffin-top and camel-toe and I wheeze and cough as I climb the slightly slanted driveway into work.

So, I have literally thrown myself into the  deep end (ok, it’s a half marathon, so maybe it’s not the deep end but I sure as hell can’t reach the rungs from here) – I paid my $80 registration fee and entered myself in the Great Ocean Road half Marathon. I’ll be running from Kennett River to Apollo Bay – a total of 26kms! I just read that, I thought it was 21!!

The Great Ocean Road is a gorgeous stretch of coastline just past Anglesea in Victoria. Long windy and hilly roads with many hairpin bends. I don’t think the hairpin bends will be a problem at  my pace, though. The view will be gobsmackingly spectacular and will match the severe pain.

I have downloaded the ‘Couch to 5km run’ onto my iPod and have had it there, at the ready, in case the mood should strike, for about three weeks. I have, more than once, put on all of my running gear only to peel it off unsoiled hours later (ok, it was slightly soiled but it’s been hot lately!).  Today is the day!! I am going to (when it cools down) run for 40 minutes without stopping.

My purpose? My goals? I am hoping that by entering this half marathon and committing to keeping a couch to half marathon in three months blog that I will reap all sorts of inadvertant rewards.

Such as:

1. Lose 10 kilos
2. quit smoking
3. look good and feel good in those cute little jogging shorts
4. wear the jogging shorts without chafing
5. wear the jogging shorts without having them disappear up my arse
6. wear my skinny lady jeans
7. feel a fabulous sense of achievement
8. to feel as though my body is a vessel of strength and stamina instead of somewhere to stash Whittakers Slabs, coloured popcorn and ice cream buried under ice magic…mmmmm ice magic

So,  follow along with me, if you will, as I embark on the journey from couch to half marathon in three months. I can see tears, I can see pain, I can see begging for mercy but I’ll stop all that in a minute and get ready to go on MY FIRST RUN!!!

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